That's the perfect word to describe my mood. I feel a bit like Ebeneezer Scrooge - but the angst is not necessarily created by the holidays. I have no motivation whatsoever today...I have no idea what to write...the energy of my children far outweighs my own once again and I am tired of constantly having to battle and climb to reach their level. Last week was busy and crazy and today I am still in recoup mode - but the situation does not lend itself to that.
Lillie scared the crap out of me this morning when she secretly grabbed a large piece of french toast and tried to eat all in one gulp....luckily the sweep of the mouth move was still in play and all she suffered from in the end was watery eyes - I had a small heart attack. Avery is constantly fighting somebody - he spent a night at grandma's - now all discipline I had been building up has crumbled away a bit around the edges. Isaiah and Huston want to run outside, split open pumpkins to collect their seeds, rake up a leaf pile, eat everything in sight, play Yahtzee, and wrestle loudly, chomp food savagely and make a mess every time you turn around.
I'm wrong every time I turn around - Steven doesn't believe what I tell him concerning minor issues, the boys don't listen or believe me when I teach them about day-to-day stuff, everyone at work seems to have the answers to the big questions of how to run my area without needing any type of input or advice from me...so basically at this point I'm not sure why I'm needed....
So really all I want to do is slip away from everyone and check into a hotel somewhere in a warm luxurious place that has a bed to sleep in, a spectacular view and room service.
I get in these moods about once every 6-8 weeks....don't worry Someone always seems to pull me out of them eventually - when I sit down and listen to His advice about my own issues. Guess I had better start setting up those appointments a little more often - but couldn't the first couple be in that luxurious hotel with the view and room service???