Thursday, April 9, 2009

Oh Dear.

I'm gonna have to get organized. I've thought about getting organized in the past, but have never really had anything push me toward that goal... long term anyway. I will often have looming projects ahead that will cause me to hunker down and put things in order and get a list of things done in a timely manner. But I have a feeling, forget the feeling, I absolutely know that I am entering a season of life that will call me to a higher standard of organization.

I've known it to be coming for quite a while. Really before this house adventure even entered into the picture. I think the addition of the 4th child really showed me that I need to think (dare I even say plan) ahead a little more than just waking up in the morning and determining what I am going to fix for supper (and actually follow through and lay something out!).

I've never really been much of a planner. I have strong inclinations to move a certain direction, but I don't sit down and think out each detail of what I need to do and when it needs to be done. I've never had long term career goals, I don't make new year resolutions. I simply go through life, see what is thrown into my path and tackle it as it comes. I never planned to have 4 kids, to work part-time while being a wife and mother and be in the middle of a new house project by the time I was 32 -- I'm more the type that sits down and looks behind me and says "man, look at that I've got 4 kids, a part-time job and a new house project - how did I get here?"

I've always been fearful of becoming a "rubber stamper" - the type that sits down and gets my life figured out on paper and then prays that God blesses my ideas (or rubber stamps my plans). I don't think that's what God calls His followers to be. But I do think that I now often times become so unorganized with life that I am missing out on God's bigger picture of things and need to find a happy middle ground. I often look up and hear my child's disrespectful tone, or realize my negative attitude, or lose my mind with all the stuff caving in on me and realize I wouldn't get into these messes if I had planned just a little bit better. It's become especially hard to stay on course since I have reached the season of life where sufficient time for good Bible study seems non-existent.

So my new favorite word is moderation - it seems to be a term that has been lost in the American vocabulary. I'm going to have to find the balance between an ultra organized planner/micromanager and the fly by the seat of your pants, spontaneous knee jerk reactor.

This new house adventure along with some upcoming events at work, a new school year (home-school years start officially in July) for now 2 kids, among other things are going to force me to become a moderately organized individual, especially since we will soon be living a good 20-30 minutes from the convenience of "town." Which even a little bit will be hard for me because it seems like every new "schedule" I compile or create falls by the wayside in a week or two - you know after life happens.

So wish me luck - really is that hard for an old dog to learn new tricks? I will soon find out.

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