is duplicity. I cannot stand people who put on airs when their actions do not match their words. I don't like it when people talk to me in a condescending manner and treat me like whatever they say concerning life, love, parenting is *the answer* and *only way* to do things. It bugs me greatly.
In my heart of hearts I really hope and pray that I don't do that to other people. Let's look into today as a snapshot of what really happens around here...
I have 15 million things on my to-do list and I don't even know where to start. I am attention deficit when it comes to house cleaning - I hop from one job to another and at the end of the day I have lots of little unfinished projects instead of a clean house. And if the project is close to being done, I'm good about thinking, "oh that is close enough" and will leave it incomplete until one day I wake up and find it's driving me crazy.
I have tons of ideas as to what I should do with the boys and what routines we are going to get into and I will often declare, "from now on, we are going to..." fill in the blank... and yeah, it never gets off the ground. Or it does for about 2 weeks and then I get sidetracked (can I please blame attention deficit???) and then the routine is all but forgotten. A great character trait to teach my kids...
I'm supposed to be keeping up with everything here at the house, all the stuff involving the kids, and all the work that is piling up at the church and instead I just am so tired that I sit around and often can't even put two thoughts together in a logical sequence. I can make to-do lists but they are so long and the tasks build upon each other so often that I can't do this until that is done and I can't do that because I have a 16 mo. old totally determined (ok, I just sat here for 3 minutes trying to remember the word determined) anyway, totally determined to pull things out of cabinets, climb onto table tops and eat things she finds in the trash can. Needless to say that I get distracted then... and the tasks do not get accomplished... instead they sit around half finished like everything else.
So never, ever sit here reading this blog and think that I am so put together and organized. Never, ever think that I always know how to handle every situation that my children dish out. Often times I am found yelling, "Don't yell at your brother that way, you shouldn't talk to people so rudely!!!" Yeah, that's just great parenting right there.
I hope to get to so many thoughts and happenings that have gone on around here lately, but there are just not enough hours in the day nor is there enough energy in this body to keep up with everything. Any spare time I get really just ends up going into sleeping... oh nap time, if only you took up the majority of the day - so many of my problems would be solved and I could be the organized, wonderfully peaceful mom that I should be.
4 comments:
It's good to know you're not perfect... seriously, though, it is nice sometimes to know that others struggle with getting the regular things of life too. Maybe NO ONE does it the way I seem to think MOST do it... maybe we're all just barely staying afloat. Maybe THAT'S the norm, we just are afrait to all admit it. Hmmmmm...
I totally think we are all afraid to admit how hard being a mom is. I just wanna reach out and give you a big ol' hug, Jessie.
I can second, third and fourth all of what you said.. I only have 1 and I find that when i get home from work there are piles of to-do items sitting there waiting for me and then fitting in play time, dinner, baths and anything else that needs to fit in between 6-9. You are SO not alone.. and Attention Deficient.. I blame it all the time:)
Amen! 16 month olds are good for now allowing us moms a moment of peace! LOL
I always have good intentions of making schedules or what not and then yeah, never getting around to follow through - you're not alone!
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